Parents anger at school claiming that victims of bullying are "whingers"

Bullied: The victim is not the problem.
Bullied: The victim is not the problem.

Parents are fuming over a recent article, posted on the website of a private boys school, that suggested the victims of bullying could be part of the problem.

Babble reports that Brighton Grammar School in Australia published the article on it's website May 1.

In it, parents are advised that “in any bullying situation, you must own your part of the problem, no matter how small, no matter how unfair it may seem. No one is lily-white and blameless.” 

The post continues: “If your son is currently being bullied, in the spirit of cleaning up your side of the street: Is he part of the problem? Even 5%?

Is he a whinger, a complainer, self-absorbed, an exaggerator, loose with the truth, a passive doormat, displaying negative body language, an approval addict, a try hard, critical or a bad sport?”

“Of course, you might say but how can my son clean up his side of the street if he is the target of cruel taunts because he has buck teeth, acne, a disability or a lisp.

That’s not his fault.”

“Of course, it’s not his fault, but owning his small part of the unpleasant problem may be learning to stand up for himself, developing grit, steely self-belief, strong self-esteem, choosing his friends wisely and reminding himself that the bullies are dealing with their own demons and that the problem lies principally with them and not him.”

Anti-bullying campaigners have slammed the exclusive private school, saying the post endorses 'victim blaming'. 'The victim is not the problem,' Bully Zero Australia Foundation chief executive Oscar Yildiz​ said, The Age reports. 'The person demonstrating that poor behaviour is the problem, not the victim.

The schools Facebook page was flooded with complaints. 'So when I was a very shy, undersized 13 year old at a new school and the bullies would punch me in the back of the head as I was just standing there or walking along it was my fault,' one person wrote.

Brighton Grammar responded to the comments, and said they were sorry for any distress they had caused.

"We believe that the article contains an important message of empowerment, however we hear the comments of some followers calling for articles with more practical tips for those experiencing bullying, and we are looking to publish content on this issue that does just that," it said.

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